Deception and scattered dreams.

[Ben]

A couple more pages of Lexxants journal, were found, presumebly a few days before he went missing.

Sunslight and Handtight -

I sit alone. Sitting, watching the ocean. Its been so long. I just sit on the island. Im home. I know this. But I do not wish to accept this. Fish jump out the water, trying to pull me in, I let myself go and I just want to topple into the water. Think of the organization. Throw up a bit, just remembering them. Memories. Still one of them, still with them in Body and soul. But no Heart? No. My purpose is just to serve them. Another Pawn to xemnas. Thinking of my father. Thinking of the keyblade war.Thinking of the swarm. The keyblade swarm. Thinking of that. Thinking of the fact that i can make one. Thinking. Thinking. Have you ever ntocied, when no living thing is in a place, everything doesnt exist? It forms when the eye sees. Thinking. Thinking. I look down into the crystal blue water, see in my reflection my life... All the people I have killed. My curse. Thinking of their families. Thinking. Thinking. Standing up, I walk over to the cave, where Sora discovered the door. That infernal door. The one that started it all.. Thinking. Thinking. I look to the empty drawings, they mean nothing. Thinking. Thinking. Thinking too much, pawns dont think. they act. Open up a rift. Destination? The Castle that never was. More precisley, Xemnases room. Thinking. THINKING.

Lies -

Sit alone in a dark room. The wind blows in through the window. I curl up into a ball on the bed, and rock a bit. I think of the consequences of what I did. Thinking of the lies that I have been put through. Thinking of the empty space, in which my heart should be. Thinking, thinking, thinking, thinking. Pawns dont think though. We just clear the front line for the big bosses to come through. Sure, im number two. But that doesnt stop me knowing im just another pawn to Xemnas. Thinking. Thinking. The lies crowd in my head. Keyblade wars. Keyblade swarms. Keyblade. Keyblade. Just another curse. Just another lie. Just another thought. Think about it. Think. Thinking. Think. Thinking. Time passes by. Hours go by like minutes are seconds. Thinking. Thinking. Keyblade, Lies, Wars.. Its all too much. Keyblades, wars, Lies.